8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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