so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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