like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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