yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
That's when you crack a 10am beer
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I just gargled with NyQuil
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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