yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
