so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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