Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
either way he was missing a nipple.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
