I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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