Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
