It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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