we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Holy sore nipples Batman
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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