hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
