So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
