i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
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