there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
