the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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