Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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