party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
