the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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