Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
All I want is dick and wine.
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