Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
