You don't have asthma, your pregnant
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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