If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
