So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize