Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I smell stomach acid.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
