when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Randomize
