you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
