a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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