There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Randomize
