I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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