I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize