you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
