Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
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