Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
