also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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