We should be called the Road Head Warriors
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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