The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize