He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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