I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I FOUND THE LEGS
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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