Your tits are I can't wait for
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
