Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
