we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Come see our sink grown plant.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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