i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
