he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize