I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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