Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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