super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
