I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize
