Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
