I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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